Surprising Grace

I had the chance to watch Disney’s “Mulan” 2020 recently. It is not a genre of movie I am usually a fan of, but somehow - quite surprisingly - it stuck with me and I resolved to write a blog post about it. (Warning: spoilers to follow!)  *****  Becoming Who I Am  But where to begin? There are so many reasons why this movie is thought-provoking (aside from its "behind the scenes" controversies, which are not the subject of this post). At base, perhaps, is that it is a coming-of-age story... a story about someone discovering their own unique gifts and using them... a kind of story that never gets old, as we are all living it to some extent, young or old. I used to think that coming-of-age was something that happens once when you are a teenager or young adult, but at 33 - an age at which I used to think my life path would be settled - I am discovering that the process goes on! Perhaps at certain ages one wrestles with the question of “who I am” in a more pointed and existent...

This is Part III of a reflection on what it means for me to be a young FCJ in today's world. Read Part I here and Part II here .  ***** 3. People of Our Time A short piece in the local newspaper about millennials and burnout caught my attention a few days ago. On doing further research I discovered the hypothesis made by some commentators that “millennials” suffer from a type of burnout specific to their generation. In a nutshell, this generation has – because of the expectations placed on them by society, and the prevalence of communications technology – internalized the idea that they must always be working, and that it is not enough just to be “average”, but they must always strive to be the best. As a result, they overcommit, work too much, are unable to relax without feeling guilty or thinking of what they should do next, and are more prone to mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. Whether or not I am a “millennial” at age 32 depends...

(This post is continued from How to Discern a Vocation to Religious Life: Part I ) Of course, we aren’t always in touch with what our deep desires are in the first place. What often preoccupy us are the shrill and incessant voices of what I will call our “surface” desires (for chips and chocolates). One of the things that helped me in my process of discernment, then, was cultivating my awareness of what was going on inside me. (I’ve written about this before in a blog post on getting in touch with the daily “movements” of our hearts .) To continue the story then: once the two-month period I had given myself had passed, besides gathering information about various congregations of religious sisters, I also started a practice known in Catholic circles as “spiritual direction”, in which I talked to someone regularly about my spiritual life, and this person helped me to notice and become more aware of how I was experiencing God’s action in my daily life. In addition, I went to retrea...

A while ago a reader of this blog asked me, “How did you discern that religious life was for you?” As we have talked a little about discerning life choices here on this blog, I thought I might post my response here too and add to that conversation. Do feel free to leave comments or write back about your own thoughts or experiences. ***** Dear Reader, Your question reminds me of a rather interesting conversation my community had earlier this year at the dinner table when one of our sisters said that someone had asked her, “How do you know if you are called to religious life?” The four of us at the table started sharing our own stories of coming to that awareness. We were each from different countries, with age differences spanning 45 years, but surprisingly enough, while the details of each person’s journey varied widely, we noticed some common threads running through each one. The first was that each of us at some point felt a desire for religious life. While some peop...

A young adult I know was sharing with me the other day a little about her search for a fulfilling job, which hasn't materialized yet. As we parted she said with some emotion, "I will be 30 in a few years, and I still don't know what I'm doing with my life!" I don't know about you, but I recognised that sense of longing and frustration at seemingly not knowing one's place in the world, and my heart went out to her. For some reason many of us grow up expecting that our lives will be settled at a certain age... but in reality I wonder if that feeling of uncertainty about one's life direction ever conclusively goes away for anyone. In my own experience (being now on the other side of 30) it varies in intensity at different stages of life... the young adult years being a vulnerable time (and mid-life, I hear!). In any case, in this world where change is the only constant, perhaps it is also inevitable - and right - that we are continually invited to qu...

  In the years since law school, I have learnt a lot more about making life choices. The spirituality of Saint Ignatius of Loyola has been a special treasure trove in that regard. Ignatius lived in the 1400-1500’s and founded an order of male Catholic religious commonly called the “Jesuits” (from whence hails Pope Francis). He is particularly known for developing a set of “Spiritual Exercises” that develops one’s relationship with the divine and helps one to make life choices. (Nowadays, the full Exercises are usually made in a silent directed retreat that lasts for a month, but it can also be adapted in different ways.) Within these exercises, he sets out a list of very practical “rules for discernment”. I first became acquainted with these “rules” around the time when I first felt an inexplicable desire to become a nun. Faced with a desire that I couldn’t really comprehend and that wouldn’t go away, I was determined to make a proper discernment on whether this was really th...

A while ago a few of us younger religious sisters and brothers were invited to share our “vocation stories” with a group of sisters who were discussing ways of accompanying young people discerning their vocations. The word “vocation” is commonly used in religious circles in its narrow sense, to mean a call to a state of life (i.e. marriage or religious life). But defined in a wider sense, it really describes one’s unique gift to the world. A friend once explained it to me this way: “Vocation is more than a role that you have, but something you are particularly called to do, that drives you. For example, your vocation might be to teach. But that doesn’t mean you have to be a teacher – it means you are drawn to teach in whatever situation you find yourself in – whether as a parent, co-worker or catechist…” How does one discover what their vocation is? It was clear from our discussion that this is a pressing question for young people today. And not just the young! Perhaps it is some...