An Ode to My Growing-Up Friends

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Last month I went "on retreat" to a beautiful place on a hill overlooking a lake. A group of teenagers were there at the same time on a retreat programme organised by their school. I was by turns annoyed, when the noise they were making made it difficult for me to experience the silence I was hoping for, and sympathetic, when I overheard their emotional sharing with each other about their lives, not without tears. It reminded me that teenage life is not easy!

One evening I was sitting quietly by myself in the garden. The sun was setting to the west, a fiery sphere of liquid gold descending gently into the silhouettes of trees cresting the hill, coloring the veils of cloud streaming across the sky a shimmering red, yellow, orange, and purple. The glorious beauty of it touched me somewhere deep inside. If I hadn't already believed in God, I would have at that moment.

Into this sacred moment, of course, barged a bunch of chattering teenagers... though the beauty of the sunset must also have touched them for their chatter was more muted than usual. They took up various positions around the garden. Two girls joined me on the parapet where I was sitting, our legs dangling over the forest canopy below. They were obviously close friends comfortable in each other's presence, and their soft conversation was interspersed with gentle laughter and periods of companionable silence.

Observing the pair of them moved me unexpectedly. Memories started to surface of the friendships I had had at that age -- the moments of shared laughter and tears, of light moments in school canteens, of the mundane yet sacred moments of our journeying together through the growing up years. Gratitude welled up in my heart.

And so here I dedicate this poem to you, my growing-up friends! It is hardly polished and hardly begins to describe my gratitude... but with it I give you all of my affection and thanks.

Your friend,
Audrey xxx

*****

You shared your pencils in class
Taught me how to buy noodles
Waited with me when my mum came late 
To pick me up

You played five stones and starfish
Talked on the phone after school
Came to my house for my birthday party
To eat my cake

You explored Orchard Road with me
Helped me tie my Girl Guide scarf
Put up with my teenage selfishness
When I pushed you aside

You hung out in church with me
Prayed and planned and goofed around
Celebrated my 21st birthday
Smashing green icing on my face

You argued over rules and cases with me
"Mugged" together in the library 
Talked about values and meaning and life
And who we wanted to be

You dressed up like a lawyer
Ventured into the working world with me
Going to meetings and lunches
Are we really grown-ups now?

You asked me to be your bridesmaid
Walking into a future I cannot follow
When I see you again I am happy 
To hold your child

You taught me to laugh, to live, to love
Gave me space to cry; to be afraid
Held me in my process of becoming
Who God made me to be

I cannot say 'thank you' enough
For sharing a part of your life, and mine

May God bless you, my growing-up friends!

*****

Food for thought:
What memories do you cherish from your growing up years?
How do the love and nurturing you received in those years continue to nourish you now?

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